Posts Tagged ‘parrot’

A parrot on the plane – Airplane jokes

Thursday, August 20th, 2009

On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess for a coffee where upon the squawks “And get me a whisky you cow!” The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the and forgets the coffee.

When this omission is pointed out to her the drains its glass and bawls “And get me another whisky you idiot”. Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another whisky but still no coffee.

Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the ’s approach “I’ve asked you twice for a coffee, go and get it now or I’ll kick you”.

The next moment, both he and the have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards. Plunging downwards the turns to him and says “For someone who can’t fly, you complain too much!”

The Magician and the Parrot

Friday, July 31st, 2009

A was working on a cruise ship in the . The audience would be different each week, so the allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again.

There was only one problem: The captain’s saw the shows every week and began to understand what the did in every trick. Once he understood that, he started shouting in the middle of the show.

“Look, it’s not the same hat!” “Look, he’s hiding the under the table!” “Hey, why are all the cards the ?”

The was furious but couldn’t do anything, it was the captain’s after all.

One day the ship had an accident and sank. The found himself on a piece of wood, in the middle of the ocean, and of course the was by his side.

They stared at each other with hate, but did not utter a word. This went on for several days.

After a week the finally said, “Okay, I give up. What’d you do with the boat?”