The last used car salesman I dealt with was a little aggressive.
After I bought the car though, he did release my wife and kids.
Archive for the ‘Work Jokes’ Category
Aggressive Salesman one liners – Work jokes
Tuesday, September 15th, 2009
New plan for work one liners – Work jokes
Tuesday, September 15th, 2009The president of a large corporation opened his directors meeting by announcing, “All those who are opposed to the plan I am about to propose will reply by saying, ‘I resign’.”
Job jokes one liners – Work jokes
Tuesday, September 15th, 2009My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned … couldn’t concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it, so they gave me the ax.
After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn’t suited for it.
Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was exhausting.
Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn’t fit in.
I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn’t live on my net income.
I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
So then I got a job in a health club, but they said I wasn’t fit for the job.
I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.
So I retired, and I found I am a perfect fit for the job!
Tell Tale Signs You Have Nothing To Do At Work – Work jokes
Wednesday, September 9th, 20091. You’ve read the entire Dilbert page-a-day calendar for 2006
2. You discover that staring at your cubicle wall long enough produces images of Elvis.
3. You’ve definitively figured out a way to get Gilligan OFF the island. . .
4. You decide to see how many Surges you can drink before the inevitable explosion occurs. . .
5. People come into your office frequently… to borrow pencils from your ceiling. . . .
6. The 5th Division of Paperclips has completely overrun the Pushpin Infantry, and General White-Out has called for reinforcements. . .
The Rules – Work jokes
Wednesday, September 9th, 20091. The BOSS always makes the rules.
2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
3. No EMPLOYEE can possibly know all the rules.
4. If the BOSS suspects the EMPLOYEE knows all the rules, the BOSS must immediately change some or all of the rules.
5. The BOSS is never wrong.
6. If the BOSS is wrong, it is because of flagrant misunderstanding, which was a direct result of something the EMPLOYEE did or said wrong.
7. If rule 6 applies, the EMPLOYEE must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The BOSS has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
9. The EMPLOYEE must remain calm at all times, unless the BOSS wants him/her to be angry or upset.
10. The BOSS must under no circumstances let the EMPLOYEE know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.