Archive for the ‘Computer Jokes’ Category

Windows 31 – Computer jokes

Wednesday, September 30th, 2009

Customer: “I have Windows Thirty One.”

Tech : “Ok, this program requires either Windows 95 or Win32s. Do you have Win32s on your system?”

Customer: “No, I have Windows Thirty One, not Thirty Two.”

Tech : “Windows 3.1 is the operating system. Win32s is a program that makes your computer fast like Windows 95.”

Customer: “What’s Windows Ninety Five got to do with it?”

Tech Supprort: “You need either Windows 95 or Win32s to run this.”

Customer: “I HAVE THIRTY ONE! WHY WON’T IT WORK?”

Tech : “Ma’am, your computer is too old. Buy a new one with Windows 95.”

Customer: “I’ve heard about Windows Three Hundred and Eleven. Wouldn’t that be better than Ninety Five?”

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Calling Tech Support – Computer jokes

Wednesday, September 30th, 2009

Five Things You Do Not Want to Hear when Calling Tech

1. “Duuuuuude! Bummer!”

2. In layman’s term, we call that the “Hindenburg Effect.”

3. “Your problem can be fixed, but you’re going to need a butter knife, a roll of duct tape and a car battery.”

4. “Press 1 for . Press 2 if your with ‘60 Minutes.’ Press 3 if you’re with the FTC.”

5. “Hold on a second, please … Mom! Timmy is hitting me!!!

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Lawyers and computers – Computer jokes

Wednesday, September 30th, 2009

and computers have both been proliferating since 1970. Unfortunately,
, unlike computers, have not gotten twice as smart and half as expensive every 18 months.

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It Just Shows Stars – Computer jokes

Wednesday, September 30th, 2009

A new employee calls the Help Desk to complain that there’s something wrong with her password. No, it’s not the usual caps-lock problem.

“The problem is that whenever I type the password, it just shows ,” she says.

“Those asterisks are to protect you,” the Help Desk technician explains, “so if someone were standing behind you, they wouldn’t be able to read your password.”

“Yeah,” she says, “but they show up even when there is no one standing behind me.”

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Computer Consultants – Computer jokes

Wednesday, September 30th, 2009

The start of the new school term always brings out the most interesting questions for computer on campus. The predominant questions this term pertain to “getting into” E-mail and how to access the “Information Highway.”

An obviously distraught student came into the consulting office yesterday complaining that his E-mail wasn’t working. His attempts to get tickets for an on-campus concert kept resulting in returned mail.

He showed me the mail address he was attempting to reach. I asked him where he obtained such an unusual mail address.

He replied, “The sign advertising the concert said, ‘begins@7:30PM’.”

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